Flowers in Winter
by ziraulo
Summary: Every Christmas Eve, she came here with a vow that this would be her last; the last day of waiting and the last day of hoping for his return. And every single year, she would break that vow.


"God, what a mess!"

There was confetti everywhere. A part of the piñata still hung from the ceiling, and there was the occasional beer can or party popper scattered on the floor. "They better not be driving after drinking that much." growled one Mouri Ran as she gazed at the mess that was the meeting hall.

"Just great, the mess is left to us organizers again." a co-worker of Ran's said. "Why, oh why was everyone too booked to actually help us clean?" lamented another. But Ran's secretary stepped forward with a triumphant look on her face.

"Humph! They may be partying now, but we're going to the biggest and most awesome party of the year!" She said. She proceeded to whip out four tickets from her pocket. "Hirano Shinobu-san's Countdown to Christmas is going to be _the_ party of the year, and we're gonna be partying in it!" She pumped a fist in the air. Her fellow cleaners cheered with her, raising their brooms in the air.

"Mouri-san, are you sure you don't want to join us tonight?" asked Ran's secretary. "Yeah, I thought you were a fan of Hirano Shinobu-san. Why aren't you going to her concert tonight?" asked another. Ran simply smiled at them. "Sorry guys, but Christmas Eve is reserved for a special someone." She replied.

Her co-workers exchanged meaningful looks. It was as if they were expecting that Ran was to go out on a date. 'Well, they aren't exactly wrong.' thought Ran. She decided to break the awkward silence between them. "Let's clean up so we can go, okay?" She suggested.

"Ran-san, you can go ahead. We'll clean up after those ungrateful bastards!" said one co-worker. She had been sweeping the floor and chanced upon their conversation. "You can't keep your special someone waiting! Besides, you've helped us organize the party too." Her secretary added. Hell, if you didn't establish the company, no one would be partying at all. You deserve a break." She let out a snort.

"T-Thank you." Ran said with wide eyes. She never expected to be free at such an early time. "But are you sure you can handle this all by yourself?" She asked. "It's fine! We can do this!" Her secretary assured her. She finally relented, and said, "I'll be leaving then.

She walked out of the building, and took one last look at it before she left for the night. The words "Orchid in Bloom" were embossed above the entrance and Ran couldn't help but feel proud. 'My own fashion label...sometimes, I can't believe it's real.' She thought.

Her hard work in the past six years certainly paid off. Her designs have been recognized across the country by people of all classes, and she was named one of the most successful young women of modern Japan. 'It happened so fast. It feels like a dream!' She thought.

Yes, truly, six years have passed, and Mouri Ran was no longer the naïve sixteen year old she used to be. She was now twenty-two years old, officially an adult. She had graduated from Tokyo University a year ago, and she was now successful in the fashion industry.

But there was something odd about this year. For some odd reason, Ran didn't even feel it. She felt like the seasons just passed her by and ignored her. Was it because she was so immersed in her work? 'Come to think of it, I rarely accepted any party invitations from anyone this year...' She thought.

As Ran walked thru the streets, she couldn't help but feel happy. Her mood was starting to lift along with the mood of the season. Everything she saw seemed to be ready for Christmas Eve. Children and adults alike carried meticulously wrapped boxes, intended to be given to their loved ones.

Shoppers crowded at the nearby department stores, all eager to get a good bargain for the holidays. Snow was slowly falling to the ground, but it really wasn't a bother. Rather, it added to the cheery atmosphere around Beika.

But what struck her the most was the couple by the giant Christmas tree in Beika Park. The girl thrust her arms out, shoving her present into the guy's chest. They guy looked surprised, but he smiled, and then accepted the present. Ran looked away once they were about to kiss.

'That's right; I don't have a present for him yet!' She thought. 'Let's see...where could I get him a present at a time like this?' She looked around. 'Ah! Yes, it was beside that toy shop!' She thought. Ran immediately walked over to the toy shop, only to make a sharp left and enter the shop beside it.

The bells on the door chimed merrily, announcing Ran's arrival into the shop. The shop itself was a neat place, filled with flowers of all kinds. Different fragrances filled the air with perfume, no matter what season it was. She ventured further into the shop, knowing exactly where the shopkeeper was.

She found him behind the racks of flowers. The shopkeeper was a young man in his early twenties. His long hair was in disarray, and he was very focused on arranging a bouquet of white lilies. Ran decided to get his attention by knocking on the wall.

The shopkeeper turned away from his work to greet her. "Oh, if it isn't Ran-san!" He said. He stood up and dusted his dark green apron. "Merry Christmas and welcome to Sawashiro Koyomi's flower shop!" He greeted. "Merry Christmas as well, Sawashiro-san." said Ran politely.

"It's been a long time since you last visited. Must have been real busy, huh?" Sawashiro asked. Ran simply nodded. "Can I have bouquet made or are you too busy?" She asked. "Of course I'll make it! Anything for one of my sister's best friends." He grinned.

"So what will it be this time? A flower arrangement for a party? Congratulatory flowers for Shinobu?" He asked, moving outside the counter. "I've got her favorite right here." Koyomi gestured to the bouquet of white lilies.

"Sorry, but I won't be attending Shinobu-chan's concert today." Ran smiled. "Why not? If you don't come, she'll freak out and think you committed suicide. Like she did last year and the year before." He shuddered. "Today's a special day that I always reserve for a special someone." She said simply. "Ah..." He nodded in understanding.

"Is it for your parent's anniversary or is it for a date?" He asked. "Unfortunately, no." Ran replied. "I give up." He sighed in defeat. "What flowers do you want for a bouquet?" He asked, gesturing to the selection of flowers behind him.

Ran tapped her chin in thought. 'I wonder what I'll get for him this time…' She thought. Koyomi Sawashiro's flower shop truly had a wonderful selection of flowers. Despite the fact that it was winter, the man was always able to get fresh flowers and keep them fresh.

"...Three red roses, forget-me-nots, lavenders, yellow bell flowers..." He named each flower that she chose. "You know about floriography, right? If you do, that's quite a message you're sending." He said. Ran shushed him in a playful manner. "He might hear you and get a clue!" She winked at him.

"Hey, I hope I'm not intruding but..." He paused, hesitating. "Is this for the same person as last year?" He asked finally. She nodded, not taking her eyes off of the pots of flowers. "You sure you don't want to add anything else, like a marigold, or a yellow rose?" He asked

Ran simply shook her head. "I...don't think I'm ready yet." She replied. A slight frown graced her features, and Koyomi decided not to ask any further questions. Instead, he walked over to his work table and cooked up a quick arrangement. "Here you go, Ran-san." He handed her the bouquet. "How much will it be?" She brought out her wallet.

"It's on the house, Ran-san. I know how much that bouquet means to you." Sawashiro smiled. Ran was about to protest, but he stopped her immediately. "Just consider that as my Christmas present." He waved a hand at her. "Thank you, Sawashiro-san." She bowed low. "I'll be leaving then." She said, right before walking out of the shop.

Ran began her journey to her destination once more, clutching the flowers close to her as she walked. She checked her watch. 'A quarter past eleven...I hope I make it in time.' The snow was starting to fall at a faster rate, and she held the bouquet closer to her. 'I can't let his present get ruined!' She thought, quickening her pace.

Finally, she arrived at her destination. It was a very dismal place. There was a black gate at the entrance, but it was left unlocked. It was very dark there, and the only source of light was the occasional street lamp. It was like the entire Beika was ready for Christmas except for this place.

If the sixteen year old Mouri Ran was to visit this place, she would be very afraid and would be most hesitant to enter. But this wasn't the same girl anymore. She simply read the sign above the gate once more, to check if it was indeed the place.

The sign read _"Beika Cemetery"_.

Ran pushed the gate, opening only enough to squeeze herself in. Tombstones stretched as far as the eye could see, but there was only one tombstone that Ran wanted to visit the most. It was one that she hasn't visited in a while, and she was looking forward to see it now.

She began to walk a long, narrow path, which led her deeper within the cemetery. The street lamps began to increase in number as she walked. Soon, the path ended, and Ran found herself in a place with a small pond.

There were very fewer graves around that area, as if it was intended to be a private place for a family to be buried. A gazebo was in the middle of the frozen pond. Oddly enough, the place seemed to be more of a park than a grave.

An unpleasant surprise met Ran as she arrived. The grave was nearly covered with white snow. 'Looks like no one's been looking after you, huh?' She thought. She knelt down and brushed off all the snow, until the entire text on the tombstone could be read.

_In loving memory of Kudo Shinichi,_

"_There is only one truth."_

His birthday and death day were etched after that, but the last two digits on his death day were replaced with dashes upon Ran's request. No matter what happened, she never gave up waiting for him. "Hello, Shinichi." She said. The silence that followed broke her heart. After all, the dead can't reply, can they?

"I've got you a present!" She said, shifting to a happier tone. Her voice sounded hollow to her ears, but she paid it no mind. Instead, she gently placed the bouquet of flowers on top of the tombstone. "I know you've gotten tired of receiving the same gift every Christmas, but this is all I can give you now that you're gone." She said.

Ran remembered their last conversation clearly. He had asked her a question so deceivingly common, to the point that she had no idea how big a role it would play in the events that followed.

"Will you wait for me?" His voice echoed in her mind. She answered "yes" immediately, without even giving it a second thought. "Why?" He asked again. Ran simply smiled and said, "Because I'm waiting for your deduction. You said you haven't deduced what's in my heart yet, right?"

She felt blood rush up to her cheeks. A statement like this would sound strange to an ordinary person listening to their conversation, but Ran was sure that he would spot the reference immediately. His words in London have left a clear mark in her mind, and now she brought them up again to remind him of his promise.

There was silence for a while, and Ran thought that he was too shocked to answer. 'No, don't be silly! He won't be shocked by anything like that!' She thought to herself. A few more seconds passed, and she thought that the line went dead. That was when she heard his voice.

"I'll be back soon, I promise you." She heard him say. His voice was soft and quiet, as if he wasn't intending for anyone to hear of that at all. But at the same time, he was using that same tone he used when he was comforting her. 'It's like he's saying it's only for my ears to hear...' Ran thought.

The call ended shortly after that, but she never felt happier in her life. She felt warmth slowly spreading through her body, and she felt all giddy, to the point that she actually considered telling her _father_ about the great news. 'I'm in love...' She sighed, collapsing on the couch.

Ran felt like she was living a fairytale that day. Who would've thought that they would end up like that? Childhood friends turned almost lovers, separated but to be united again one day. Sonoko even thought of it as romantic.

She was filled with so much hope after that call. She was finally able to say what was in her heart, and she was very eager for his return. And so, she waited, remaining happy and content with the fact that Shinichi loves her, she loves him, and someday, he'll be back.

But her happiness was short-lived. Shinichi remained missing for the remained missing for the rest of the year, not making another appearance and not even calling anymore. Conan went missing after that night as well, and even professor Agasa claimed that he hadn't seen the boy since Christmas Eve.

Even so, life had to go on. She didn't alienate herself from others, and her social circle actually expanded as she moved on to her senior year and to college. She even tried to go on dates (upon Sonoko's insistence) but she almost never went for a second date with the same guy, much less a third one.

She found herself comparing her date with Shinichi every single time. She would sometimes end up staring into space for the entire date, making everything awkward for the two of them. It seems that she still pined for Shinichi, no matter how much time has passed.

A year after that, he was declared dead according to the rules of state. The next year, people began to move on and forgot about him, save for a chosen few that never stopped looking. Hattori, Agasa, and some others gave up their search after the third year. His parents gave up after the fourth. The fifth year ended with only Ran left waiting for him. And today was the end of the sixth year.

A loud voice interrupted Ran's thoughts. From a distance, she could hear Hirano Shinobu's voice counting down to midnight. The snow had already stopped falling, and the festivities were starting.

The clock strikes midnight and she felt her eyes water. A flood of tears always accompanied the beginning of another year of waiting.

A loud explosion distracts her, and she looks up upon instinct. Colorful fireworks lit up the dark, starless sky, and some of their color seeped into the snow, giving it a tentative dye job. The annual Beika Christmas Fireworks show has started, and it was visible throughout the entire district.

Ever since Shinichi was proclaimed dead, she would come to the cemetery at midnight, just to watch the show with him. Every Christmas Eve, she came here with a vow that this would be her last; the last day of waiting and the last day of hoping for his return. And every single year, she would break that vow.

"I wish you could see this from wherever you are." Ran closed her eyes. The tears she held back were now trailing down her cheeks.

_I see it._

Ran let out a soft gasp. 'That voice...' She turned around, hoping to catch even just a glimpse of Shinichi behind her. "Shinichi?" She called out. There was no answer. "If you're out there, come out, baka!" She shouted. She sank back into the ground, sobbing. 'I'm going crazy, aren't I?' She thought as she wiped her tears.

She stayed at Shinichi's grave until the fireworks show ended. Miraculously, she stopped crying half-way through it. She felt warmth slowly spread throughout her body, as if she was sitting in front of a fire place with a warm blanket around her. But the funny thing was that it was a chilly Christmas Eve! One wouldn't feel that kind of warmth out in a cold, snowy graveyard.

And then, Ran realized that her heart was beating faster than usual, and she felt like a heavy burden was taken off of her shoulders. The feeling of loneliness was slowly being washed out, and was replaced by another feeling that she couldn't describe.

'And that was just from hearing his voice...' She thought. 'Correction: That was just from thinking that I heard his voice.' She blushed, and for once, she was happy that Shinichi wasn't there. It would be very embarrassing if he saw this.

The fireworks show had already ended once she snapped out of her thoughts. So she stood up and dusted the snow off of her coat before deciding to speak once more. "Shinichi, I gave you those flowers to help you in your deduction, so come back quick and tell me the answer, okay?" She smiled.

Ran walked away from his grave that night, feeling better than she had in years. The visit had renewed her hope that someday, somehow, her detective would return to her. And no matter what people said, she knew that he was worth the wait.

~ Owari

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><p>Author's note: I finally cranked out something angsty enough! Yay me! Oddly enough, this fic is supposed to be a Christmas special, inspired by the song Rain by YUI.<p>

Anyway, this is my first attempt in writing angst, so don't be shy on dishing some constructive criticism my way. Constructive criticism only, people! Flames will be thrown back your way with twice the intensity!

Meanings of the flowers used:

3 red roses – I love you

Lavender – Faithful

Forget-me-not – True love

Yellow bell flower – Thinking of you

Marigold – Pain and Grief

Yellow roses – Dying love or Betrayal

Disclaimer: I am female, so therefore, I am not Gosho Aoyama. Duh. XDDDD


End file.
